Many couples don’t make out time to discuss these important issues below before getting married. To every couple, addressing the issues listed below is not always an easy conversation, however it is essential that couples discuss each of them in-depth now, rather than waiting for a shocker after saying “i do”.
If you want your marriage to be successful, the following marriage issues must be discussed before you get married.
1. YOUR HOME
Even if you are already living together, it is still important to discuss what type of house you need. Do you prefer a rented apartment or you want to build your own in the nearest future. It is important to discuss the type of home you wish to live together in the feature. Do you want to move to a different city? All these you must discuss before ever getting married.
Being intimate is an important part of a married couple’s relationship and in courtship. Having sex alone is not enough to guarantee intimacy in marriage. Talking about sex is very important. You need to be convinced that you can trust telling your partner your sexual needs. Are you comfortable sharing your sexual desires with your partner? How many times do expect to have sex in your marriage within a week? Are you happy with your sex life? What do you love about your sex life? Do you wish anything was different? These questions should be taken care of.
Whether you are an inter-faith couple or you share the same beliefs, you have to discuss the role of religion in your relationship. It is very common for your families to try to influence their children in terms of religion when choosing a marriage partner and even after marriage, it is important for you and your partner to decide how you will practice your faith and train your children before the wedding. What will be your reaction if your child decides to experience other faiths?
Before getting married to someone, it is important that you and your partner agree on the number of children you will have. Do you both want children or not? Would you consider adopting a child or children if you cannot have biological children? Are you and your partner of the same philosophy regarding issues like this?
There are different ways every couple manage their own finances. What are your preferences when it comes to holding bank accounts. Do you prefer having separate bank accounts or having one account? Apart from your shared account, are you permitted to hold a separate bank account? one of the reasons having a shared account is preferable to individual accounts is that it brings the ‘ours’ feeling that promotes togetherness which is good for marriage rather than the ‘mine’ feeling of separation. Will all your finances be combined or a percentage should be kept personal? How will you deal with differences in your spending habits? Who will be in charge of paying which bill? All these are issues to be considered.
Communication is very important in marriage or any relationship, so you have to discuss about it now and not when you are already married. If you have communication issues now, it will be very difficult to work together in marriage especially when children come along. Realize that arguments don’t solve problems. Whenever there is a disagreement, it is better that you sit down with your spouse and talk over the issue rather than raise your voices in argument. Couples argue, however their argument should be constructive and towards archiving a mutual solution to issues. Each spouse should listen to and consider the other person’s feelings, rather than apportioning blames. Find out the communication techniques that work better for you.
Before getting married, you should discus these issues with your partner for you to have a successful and happy marriage